When people go out to eat they need things. When people need things in a restaurant they result to any ridiculous and annoying means to get your attention. Here are a couple behaviors and actions that I've taken notice of. (Warning!!! I do and do not agree with the below actions)
- "The 747" (bringing the plane in for the landing) - This action requires two arms waving feverishly in the air above the customers head much like what you see out the airplane window before taking off or landing. It takes everything in my power not to do the exact same style of waving back at the customer. (No one said I was sweet)
- "The *Thank You God* Point" - This can be seen mainly on the Academy Awards, Grammy Awards, and other award shows when celebrities point up to God in thanks. Notable behavior required: one arm raised above the head at full stretch with finger pointed to God or ceiling. Arm goes up when server is approaching or passing. Warning!! If arm remains up with pointed finger this may just be "The Ultimate Fan" or "The Teacher's Pet" (see below). Customer may or may not make eye contact while doing this move.
- "The Come Here, You're In Trouble Finger" (best with mom stare) - This is what you used to get when you did something super bad when you were a kid. This is usually performed by parents yet does not discriminate from others using this tactic. As a server this is highly annoying and puts me in my six year old place. I want to know what's wrong but also want to run the other way to ensure my safety.
- "The Uncomfortable Shy Wave" - This is exhibited by people that don't want to trouble themselves or others yet need something. These types of people usually have a very low quite voice and avoid making any eye contact. This type of customers does not respond to any sort of aggressive or head strong energy. Look.. I'm not going to beat you, I just need to know what you need.
- "The Glass Tap" - The annoying person that taps on their empty glass with a finger or ring. DO NOT EVER DO THIS!!!! EVER!!!! If you aren't giving a speech or have a special announcement - DO NOT do this behavior. This is the worst fucking way to get your server/bartenders attention. In fact this is the perfect way to get someone to ignore you. (The sister move to "The Glass Tap" is shaking your empty glass - NOT OK)
- "The Drive-by Grab" - This behavior happens when people are talking and don't have time to use other methods to get your attention. Server walks past table to attend to other tables as customers arm reaches out in a grabbing motion. This is not a very effective technique to get your servers attention since most people don't like to be touched by strangers.
- "The Teacher's Pet" - Remember sitting by the know it all kid in elementary school... yeah the one with their hand constantly in the air waiting for the teacher to call on them. Yep, that's the one, the one that does the impatient hand jiggle forcing gravity out of their know it all way. This can be effective and tolerable yet it's still somewhat annoying embodying the frustration that Ms. Norris must've felt.
- "The Dog Whisperer" or "The Cesar Milan" - This is when customers get your attention by making strange "pssst.. pssst" noises with their mouth. Some actions that go with this behavior include pointing and snapping your fingers. I usually avoid giving these people my attention right away since I am not a dog and don't respond to "pssst.. pssst". Use your words people.
- "The Shout Out" - Customers have decided to bypass all other typical behavior and go straight for the shout out. "HEY", "YO", and if they know your name (better hope they don't) "DONNA"!! This tactic can be effective yet is startling for those waiting on you.
- "Doo-Wop Snap" - This is pretty self explanatory if you ask me but for the sake of explanation: This is when customers use finger snapping to get your attention. Varieties on the behavior include: "The Dog Whisperer" and "The Shout Out". In rare cases you can see this used in cahoots with "The Drive By Grab". This is often seen by hipsters that are used to using finger snapping rather than clapping at shows.
- "The Jedi Mind Trick" - This is a mind controlling method used by customers to literally will you over to them. You can see this clearly when you notice someone starring intently at you with a concentrated somewhat frustrated look. Variations on the behavior include two fingers pointed in the air much like that of famous Jedi's from Star Wars movies. The other notable variation is a finger or two on the temple of the onlooker. I personally don't mind this method and am amused by the somewhat effectiveness of it, not too mention how ridiculous most people look doing it.
- "The Unicorn" - This is typical of bar patrons rather than people sitting at a table, yet I've seen it with both. This is when the customer uses their pointed finger near their eyes or forehead to point at their empty glass for a refill or whatever else needs attention.
- "The Ultimate Fan" - See "The Thank You God Point" for reference. This is simply when the #1 team finger stays in the air unwavering.
These are just a few actions that I have taken note of over the years. The styles and behaviors are subject to change and often do. The bottom line here is: treat people the way you'd like to be treated. Pssst, pssst.
- "The Uncomfortable Shy Wave" - This is exhibited by people that don't want to trouble themselves or others yet need something. These types of people usually have a very low quite voice and avoid making any eye contact. This type of customers does not respond to any sort of aggressive or head strong energy. Look.. I'm not going to beat you, I just need to know what you need.
- "The Glass Tap" - The annoying person that taps on their empty glass with a finger or ring. DO NOT EVER DO THIS!!!! EVER!!!! If you aren't giving a speech or have a special announcement - DO NOT do this behavior. This is the worst fucking way to get your server/bartenders attention. In fact this is the perfect way to get someone to ignore you. (The sister move to "The Glass Tap" is shaking your empty glass - NOT OK)
- "The Drive-by Grab" - This behavior happens when people are talking and don't have time to use other methods to get your attention. Server walks past table to attend to other tables as customers arm reaches out in a grabbing motion. This is not a very effective technique to get your servers attention since most people don't like to be touched by strangers.
- "The Teacher's Pet" - Remember sitting by the know it all kid in elementary school... yeah the one with their hand constantly in the air waiting for the teacher to call on them. Yep, that's the one, the one that does the impatient hand jiggle forcing gravity out of their know it all way. This can be effective and tolerable yet it's still somewhat annoying embodying the frustration that Ms. Norris must've felt.
- "The Dog Whisperer" or "The Cesar Milan" - This is when customers get your attention by making strange "pssst.. pssst" noises with their mouth. Some actions that go with this behavior include pointing and snapping your fingers. I usually avoid giving these people my attention right away since I am not a dog and don't respond to "pssst.. pssst". Use your words people.
- "The Shout Out" - Customers have decided to bypass all other typical behavior and go straight for the shout out. "HEY", "YO", and if they know your name (better hope they don't) "DONNA"!! This tactic can be effective yet is startling for those waiting on you.
- "Doo-Wop Snap" - This is pretty self explanatory if you ask me but for the sake of explanation: This is when customers use finger snapping to get your attention. Varieties on the behavior include: "The Dog Whisperer" and "The Shout Out". In rare cases you can see this used in cahoots with "The Drive By Grab". This is often seen by hipsters that are used to using finger snapping rather than clapping at shows.
- "The Jedi Mind Trick" - This is a mind controlling method used by customers to literally will you over to them. You can see this clearly when you notice someone starring intently at you with a concentrated somewhat frustrated look. Variations on the behavior include two fingers pointed in the air much like that of famous Jedi's from Star Wars movies. The other notable variation is a finger or two on the temple of the onlooker. I personally don't mind this method and am amused by the somewhat effectiveness of it, not too mention how ridiculous most people look doing it.
- "The Unicorn" - This is typical of bar patrons rather than people sitting at a table, yet I've seen it with both. This is when the customer uses their pointed finger near their eyes or forehead to point at their empty glass for a refill or whatever else needs attention.
- "The Ultimate Fan" - See "The Thank You God Point" for reference. This is simply when the #1 team finger stays in the air unwavering.
These are just a few actions that I have taken note of over the years. The styles and behaviors are subject to change and often do. The bottom line here is: treat people the way you'd like to be treated. Pssst, pssst.
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